Just me...I think your outcomes are a little one sided as well...
I did win my H back...it was a year AFTER his A with OW ENDED...there was no crawling back...we both had a lot of painful issues to deal with...I don't think I was a doormat...nor was I insensitive....
I don't think once a cheater always a cheater either...especially if there is a long term history...sometimes things happen to a person emotionally...I saw my H change into someone I didn't know he was capable of being...and someone I know he didn't really like being...that being said he is coming around....he is sorry...and has expressed that there is a lot of internal guilt that he is now dealing with....just because he didn't crawl and beg back doesn't mean he didn't feel it inside...people grieve in different ways....and I feel this was a sort of grieving process for him and me...
Her H isn't living with her...he came back briefly and left...he wasn't/isn't ready...too much confusion going on in his head...and as I have tried to explain to her...she needs this time on her own to get her self straight...separation can be a good thing...even if the other wastes it on an A...
Tam...You did great yesterday...give him space...give him time...focus on you....you did all of that in one day....and you have seen results....but don't count on them everytime....MLC'ers are totally unpredictable...when they get to the predictable point...that is usually when they are ready to come back or you realize you don't want them back...
I see a tremendous amount of hope in your situation...much more then I saw in my own for the first 1 1/2 years H was gone!
