how long did it take you to get to where you are now? I understand it's a process and I know it takes time.
UA, I think everyone has a different timetable on getting over hurt and all those painful memories, etc. I know for me, I just got tired of waking up every morning and trying to figure out how I am going to endure today wondering when my W will come to her senses. I think all of us just has a breaking point where we will say.."I refuse to go on thinking these thoughts and having a fear of the unknown, meaning, unknowing what is going to happen..I will take charge and make the CHOICE to go on to make myself happy with no expectations."
I guess it all comes down to, how much can your mind and heart take of reliving what could have been, knowing what you know now, rather than learning from the past to present a better future. Look at it from another perspective: If you remember the past mistakes and pain you went through, wouldn't you want to know that to keep yourself from doing it again. It took me a matter of a few days of hard thought after months of pain and anguish to realize I needed to wake up and soon. It almost was a numb feeling.
The past will be there always, don't bury it....just learn from it, and it the pain associated with it will diminish. It is truly a matter of choice, and God helped me with that.
I too think it all depends on the circumstances.... If someone is just done and ready to move on, honestly I can't imagine the internal battle, but Hubs and I didn't want to move on if we had a chance to rebuild and make better what we already had.
Another thing...he said over and over "I came home" - it took me a month (my bomb was 2/8) to finally get that he wasn't using that as a threat or as an atta boy, he was saying, I was hurting so badly from this that I seriously thought about walking, but I'm here to try. I get that now. I was too busy focusing on MY hurt.
Again, I think every situation is different, but sweets, the one thing YOU CAN control is YOU. I promise, once you focus on that, it will make everything so much easier.
