This woman posted here for her own personal reasons. Maybe she wanted to help us out, maybe she wanted to absolve herself of guilt and blame, maybe she wanted all of us to just let go and further the erosion of the institution of marriage. Who knows? Whatever we read into her motives are our own projections. Sure, we see evidence and clues, but we're putting together a picture based on this evidence for our own personal reasons. Let's choose to heal, to forgive and to see the positive (perfect forum for practicing PMA!) rather than exercising hatred and blaming someone else for the ways in which we victimize ourselves.
She wrote what her purpose in posting was:
"I think my point in posting here is simply so that folks can understand that not every Other Woman is a souless hussy out to wreck homes. There are those of us that simply have had the luck of being in the right place at the wrong time. I'm definitely not condoning cheating, but sometimes things set into motion and it's easy to talk the talk of resisting temptation, but not so easy to walk the walk, so to speak. "
To acknowledge that one has been victimized by infidelity, doesn't mean that you are choosing victimhood. It is a recognition of an event. This is a support group for people who have been victimized by infidelity BUT who are searching for ways to claw back out of that pit.
People who post here may have just found out about it last week, others have been working on it for years. Those that found out recently are going to be very *raw* and not given to have much sympathy for any OM or OW who shows up here wanting to justify their bad choices and whine for understanding.
That's like salt on an open wound.
Time and effort will eventually take the sting out of being betrayed, but I don't think we should be a Job's friend to our fellow posters who haven't had the time to process their pain.
