Bizarre situation

[geordie]

Well, the past week has had its ups and downs. But the positive things H has said were:

- I don't feel like I deserve to come back
- the 14 years that we had will never compare to what I have with OW
- This is all I've ever wanted (meaning me, S, the house etc)
- how can I face your parents again
- how can you ever forgive me
- Don't think I'm having a great time because this situation is stressing me out
- I don't want to look back and regret making a big mistake by leaving you

Words I know.....not to be believed....but I am wondering whether he is starting to come out of his fog. Of course, there were tears and I slipped back into calling her a wh***....saying their whole R is based on lies and deceit (he denied it, saying that they didn't lie to each other (!!!???!!!).

He hugs me tight and calls from work, calls me "babe" and even says "babe" on the texts he sends. This past week has has called on the 2 days that I never usually hear from him. He looked me in the eye, held me tight and said "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything". Said it with tears in his eyes. I said "me too". Despite all these positives he still drives back to OW (says he's "not ready yet" to stay over at our home). I guess I just don't know whether he really wants to come back or whether he is just keeping his options open and seeing who (me or OW) will kick him out first. My heart tells me he is seriously messed up in the head and IF he is committed to coming back and breaking all contact with OW we could rebuild our marriage. My common sense tells me that perhaps I should get out of this R now.....This is the second PA (albeit the most severe, and the first was 12yrs ago)and I don't know if I can ever trust him again. Advice please!! Is this normal behavior for someone considering coming back? He admitted to me that he has strong feelings for her.

Just when I think I am coping I get down again.....