I presume you are referring to Two Sided Coin's original post, and not to Lissett's magnificent expression of feeling.
Nonetheless I disagree that it should be deleted. TSC has given an honest and courageous (to the extent anonymous posts take courage) insight into her perspective on things.
The fact that perspective is so distorted by her need to justify her actions is actually highly instructive to all of us whose families are being wrecked by self-centred people with no concern for the welfare of small children. It should make us redouble our efforts to fight against this casual, careless, couldn't give a f*** attitude to others and to stand our ground and fight for our marriages and our families.
It is notable that not once does she say "having given thought to the well being of this small child, I decided....[xyz]". That is exactly the attitude the OM in my stich has towards my own precious children. Couln't give a f***, his head just firmly stuck up his own fundament.
Well, his day of reckoning will arrive. Meanwhile I will do all the parenting needed to protect my little flock from such total and utter selfishness.
As I read the crap that was flowing from two sided it reminded me of things my husband had said that is OW had said. She actually talked to me on the phone when he first moved in with her at the first of Jan. She had the nerve to say she understood how I felt and that she didnt want me to be hurting and the kids to hurt. What a bunch of bull! If these women cared about the kids they would tell our husbands to take a flying leap. I agree with Lis and I applaud her for saying what we are all feeling. I draw so much strength from God but I am human. I have times when I just cant stand this anymore. It is at those times, God whispers Dont Give UP! My kids are hurting so much and it kills me inside. I am trying to be patient, I am trying to be positive and do things. It still hurts like hell to be in this limbo while he is living with his OW. I can say without a doubt I would never do this to someone. I would never pull a man from his family. I know that without a doubt.
Thank you Liz for your post. Thank you. thank you.
It helped me to read it, I do not feel so alone and confused and scared.
People who interfer in marriages get no sympathy from me at all. It is a lack of character, integrity and self. I will not say oh your good person, because clearly OW/OM are not.
To the original poster, the fact that you were cheated on in your own marriage and now are breaking up another's relationship, is this some sort of sick revenge or ego boost. Until you live and honest life and care about the well being of others, you WILL NOT have a happy life. You need to repent and do some serious soul searching. Leave that man ALONE.
Bomb 1/06 D dismissed 11/07, attempt reconciliation. Premature. Divorce final October 31, 2008. OW looks like bad history. Over. Still hopeful. Baby steps. In R with my X.
Not me on this one ! You are an expert thread locker btw Sol !Good job with Ben's 500 plus one !
Anyway....
Why all the intolerance on the BB's ??
This is the third time I have seen this in the last 4 months. Here was someone who was trying to reach out.. it starts out ok.. then suddenly ( see the middle of page one) folks go nuts about the affair.. bring their own personal sitch's into it and just develope a mob mentality and whack the thread owner with 2x4's totally ignoring the reason the person is here ! I hate this !
I know there are a lot of hurting members on the BB.. but geez guys !Do you think you can whack your H or W's other person at the same time you wack the poster ? It sure seems that way..
The responses I see here are mean and pretty heartless.. like "High 5's" for what someone else posted on this thread...That is not what this Board is about.
Walk a mile in the shoes.. show some tolerance and reach out to those that have the courage and want some help and understanding of what has gone in THEIR LIVES. If you cannot do that.. ? Well ? Dont post to them !No matter how ignorant and odd the post.
The Island of Misfit Toys has many members.. and whether you like the reason they are here or not.. or agree with what they did.. Dont Judge them ! That is not up to YOU to do ! Stop It !
Now.. My reply to this short 3 page thread...
I thought the early responses to your sitch were right on !
You do need to take responsibility for what your life is about and your present circumstances and feelings !
You made certain choices etc.. that made YOUR life YOURS. I would guess that you are/were here because you want to change/modify certain feelings and behaviors and learn from some bad decisions ?
If you are here for that reason.. well you are in a good place as there are many many folks that have gone through your experience (S cheats.. and then YOU do too/YOU cheat and then S does too ! ).
The members of the BB can help you assuming they can get over themselves and their sitch's (?).
