There ARE people out there who would love you for you. So don't ever fool yourself into believing her bs. You have so much to offer stubborn... and you are trying so hard to save your R...
So.. get yourself a break. You need to not think about your sitch for a minute at least. Do something nice for you... you matter and I don't want you losing yourself in this marathon you are running... take care of you, sweetie. Hang in there. Put yourself first!!