Lou, talking about other topics WHILE your H is fcuking you has nothing to do with whether the W likes sex or not! I follow and agree with that.
I was thinking that how she overcomes some of dislike for sex. Yes/no/maybe, ever hear of someone zoning out because they didn't like sex?
If you were TALKING to me about a subject I didn't care one bean about, I STILL wouldn't interrupt you and go off on what happened at work to day or what I heard on the radio. A mild form of changing the subject is common with BB. It is difficult for her to stick to the main topic.
Are you saying that the fact that she doesn't like sex makes it okay for her to chatter about other subjects during the act? Isn't that what some people do when they don't like something, zone out? I am not saying it is right and I don't condone it.
I try to engage BB, to create an environment we can both be in and in the mood with me. It happens some time. Sometimes, instead of being some other place mentally, she falls a sleep.
I used to like to go in the hot tub with her, till the dogs had to be in on the deal and BB started to talk to them or made comments about them missing their mommy.
Sometimes when in the hot tub or on car trips, she would go on and on about something she didn't like at work, or about something else. I felt like I was being dumped on, so gradually I cut back on hot tubing, till we quit all together. I said hot tubing wasn't that enjoyable anymore and BB said that was the only time she felt she had my full attention.
Are you saying that the fact that she doesn't like sex makes it okay for her to chatter about other subjects during the act? It is OK to talk about other things, but not to the point where if I kiss her, it feels like the outside event chatter is more important than being with me.
When she was in her shopping addiction mode, she would come to bed if I turned on the QVC program in the bedroom. I thought, she gets what she wants and I do too. At first I didn't mind her watching and the program didn't bother me. The years up to her spending $5,200 a year had me in QVC or me lady, decide now mode.
I was too passive then to tell her no TV. She watched the program about 10% of the time we were making out with me doing most of the making. That was 3 and 4 years ago. Bad habit, right.
It would be so nice if BB was there physically and mentally, and enjoyed sex. I often wish she would push back or lean into my moves. The 80/20 deal we have going on now, well it is better than nothing and sometimes I think not worth the effort.
