Of all the stuff going on, that's really breaks my heart. We had put off children until we got a house. Right now, we should be trying to start a family and not getting divorced.
On one hand, I'm glad that we're not going through this with children. But it breaks my heart when she tells me to get on with my life, marry again and start a family.
Sigh... at least I have my niece and soon another niece/nephew on the way this summer.
Sorry about bringing down the mood, I just needed to get that out.
"I made the wall of shadow draw back, beyond desire and act, I walked on.
Oh flesh, my own flesh, woman whom I loved and lost, I summon you in the moist hour, I raise my song to you."
No Matt, I understand. I do not have children either. So being around my new niece does stir up a sadness, that H and I did not ever have children. But God must have a reason for it, I just don't know it yet. And H is so messed up right now he would only make matters worse with any kids we might have had. Still though, I shed tears over it.
Most of us really marry only once. First love endures, even unto our dying day. And we never really divorce.
The baby issue is true for me too. Neither of us was ready for a long time. H started pushing for one out of the blue a few years ago--probably around when MLC started. Then it turned out that I had fibroids and might not be able to have kids. Luckily the surgery was successful and I am physically able; that kick in the teeth also made me realize that I was ready...and by then he was in full MLC and A.
Thank god I don't have children as I deal with this. I hate to think that the window of opportunity is closing as I age, though. I guess we'll see what happens further on in the journey. I heard a great quote the other day on a Wayne Dyer program: "If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans."
Hope, I'm lighting a candle for your job! Be well.
I was thinking again today, amidst all of this happiness, that H is missing out on so much that he could be a part of. Not just with me, but with everyone in my family who loved him very much. He and my brother were very close for many years. H should have been here to see this, but he is not. And he didn't end up giving my brother a call, but I guess I didn't really expect him to do that.
Yup, yup, yup... I could have written this... even the calling the brother part. Been there. My brother had a baby last Feb, and H (formerly my brother's closest friend) didn't bother calling. As for missing out, that's how i have felt on many occasions. There have been times when I'm with my kids thinking, he is the one who is missing out on some real joys of life.
Anyway, glad to hear things are going well for you. Keep us posted about the job.
Married 9 years Kids 5 and 6 Bomb 2006 H back and forth for a year M now back on track
I love how we all relate so well to what the other is feeling. It is such a calming feeling to read posts like these. Thank you so much.
No call about the job today so I guess Monday is the day I find out. AMD, thank you for lighting a candle, that is SO nice of you. I told God, it's up to You now. I did my best.
I'm definitely coming down with a cold so I am going to bed. Thank you so much for the support, as always. Yes, my little niece is an angel. I am blessed to be her aunt.
Most of us really marry only once. First love endures, even unto our dying day. And we never really divorce.
