Oh, she does not look ill at all. She is 15 years younger than me, but, she looks very healthy actually, although, she cannot hold a candle to me! i think I am pretty outside and most definitely inside I have got her blown away! Not to brag, really I am not conceided, but this, i do feel.
I just wish my husband did not have such a warped sensed of a genuinely good hearted person and a coniver and a user. He is so blind.
Her other cancer is gone, and they do not know if this lump is or not, but she is milking it all the way with him.
I know I cannot control other people and to be honest with you, I am still working on controling myself. I wish I was a self confident person so I could deal with this better.
Someone at work just found he was cheated on by his second wife of 7 years and he picked up packed up and moved out and on and he says he is glad he done done done. Why can't I be that strong. I really am tired of being the one doing and trying and wooing and treating him like a king.
I am almost to the point right now myself about needing some attention from a man, to be told I'm pretty and treat me good and hold me and make me feel special and WANT to spend time with me, not because they feel they have to because they have spent so much time with their Slu** bitc* and they are feeling guilty. I meet people when I am out and have been turning guys down, but last couple of days i have been so close to accepting and have been "looking" at other guys and think I just might try it myself. So close. I am tired of feeling like and "OLD SHOE" tossed aside, not good enough and what makes me feel so terrible is I am giving and have been for so long giving everything of myself and always trying so hard.
Venting again. Thanks for all you support. I do feel like a somebody here.
p.s. She called him twice already today. Aggghhh. But he called me on his break, that was unusual, and nice. Tire of her! Tire of her! Whine girl! Whine!
