Take a deep breath here. Please understand that the things to focus on are the things that you can control. Don't let your mind launch without you. It will just spin out of control and run right over you.
Here are some facts you can consider. If he did give L a check, they often get the retainer up front even if they are just doing paperwork in prep for filing.
If they do file, you will find some on this site that did so years ago and are still not taking the next step. That is why some states toss the action out after it lingers a year without further effort. He may feel it is just a step he must take. If they tell people they are going to do it, they often feel they must in order to keep their credibility. They may even be getting coached by a third party they should ignore. Hey, some IC even offer support to someone they think is looking for the strength, when they should be encouraging otherwise.
There are so many variables that you can not know and may never know, so don't let your mind race off the end of the runway. Talk to your own L. First contact is often free and just lets them know you may need their help if served. They can give you the best advice here.
In my case, I was finally told that I needed to have my L contact the other as being served can be done via fax between the Ls and avoid personal emotional drama.
A good reason to have already met a L you feel good about, and have a business card handy in the event you need to provide contact info quickly.
The person paying L to file has to tell the L whether or not to serve or work out some other form of processing. Some angry filers want to hurt the other person and have them served at work in an embarassing manner. Stupid is as stupid does. This justifies returning the favor as you counterfile.
Since my W works in very conservative office that does not know she races around from bar to bar on her Harley with bikers and chose to destroy her family, dating ex coworkers ... she was very terrified I would counterfile her at work. Very afraid all her secrets would blow up at work. She kept her L from doing anything threatening until I had time to talk to someone and have them work it out via fax.
Counterfiling seemed standard with my L. A few more small processing fees, but it basically stated we denied any and all allegations made against me by her .... etc. Just a global statement of "No, I don't think it will be that easy"
Take some time away from what you are doing and worrying about to release some tension. Go out in the air and look at the sky. If you are not seeing an IC and think you may need some third party support for your fears, it may help. You will get as much help here as we can provide by keyboard. You may want to be with family or church family or favorite hair stylist to unload your concerns. I strongly suggest you do so. I also advise you to avoid trashing H with anyone that will be too quick to steer you into anger and revenge.
At this stage you have no idea what will really happen. Do not assume in big bites. Nibble at this in manageable pieces. Don't worry about the next bite until you have found a way to process and work with the first. Nothing happens overnight. Anything that happens will take a great deal of time. You are at least finding what you know at this point ... with a weekend ahead.
Use this break away from business concerns to create isolated quality time with kids. Plan some time to relax in a tub or get a manicure. Look in the mirror. When you do, drive away the frowns, they wrinkle your natural beauty. Think about the person you really are. Think about how wonderful you were before this drama and how wonderful you will be when it is resolved and behind you in some way. Smile at that person. Tell that person you have and will continue to do your best, always working at being a better mom, person, and partner in life to all that you share this planet with.
If you see any pain in the mirror, kiss it and make it better. If you see any guilt in the mirror, forgive it and let it go. If you see other people in the mirror, we are there to support you and help you any way we can.
