Everhopeful, your post makes a lot of sense to me. I agree that my h didn't mature as I did, during our marriage - we married pretty young, and he was very intellecutually bright, and sort of focused on this rather than growing emotionally. I think he 'woke up' one morning and found himself actually middle-aged, but emotionally still youg, and instead of moving forward he went into reverse. I had a much more grounded childhood, and was more secure in every way. I also think I provided him with the stability and love he craved.
Although MLCers say it is all about the LBS, their actions certainly give the lie to this. He has been pretty horrible to everyone, including his kids. So he fell out of love with them for a while, but now he is starting to try and move closer to them, but of course he has been unpleasant to them and emootionally absent, and still not fully recognising that he has to make a lot of effort to rebuild relationships. There is an important learning part of MLC, but it certainly is a destructive process. Whatever I needed to learn, my kids never deserved this. I think we forget them in this, all too often.
