Ah yes, that pesky need to be pefect syndrome. Ewh... no one on this board knows about that one... Hmmm. Certainly explains your need to have your H hear you and validate your feelings. Without him doing so, you could not tell if you were hitting the 'perfect' mark. He could withhold it to KEEP you from hitting the 'perfect' mark, and always control the R... for without the 'knowingness' of you perfectly taking care of someone, you will wade into the sh!t, rise and take the bait, whether you want to do it or not.
To constantly expect him to validate you, you attempt to control the R by controlling his actions and responses.
(NOD) BTDT.
Ah, well, welcome to the club of us imperfect souls. If you need a Center of the Universe Chair... let me know... mine is very comfy cozy, and I am willing to share.
Hmmm. Certainly explains your need to have your H hear you and validate your feelings. Without him doing so, you could not tell if you were hitting the 'perfect' mark. He could withhold it to KEEP you from hitting the 'perfect' mark, and always control the R... for without the 'knowingness' of you perfectly taking care of someone, you will wade into the sh!t, rise and take the bait, whether you want to do it or not.