Tension? What tension. This exchange was nothing! At least to me it wasn’t. It did seem to bother you Fearless. I am wondering why you thought there was tension too and why you feel “compelled” to keep things clear, address any assumptions and restore the peace? I’m not saying there is anything wrong with that, but there is a rescuer element underneath all that. I think that is what Corri senses too. That rescuer is all about you and no one else. A rescuer can also be about control.
What I do personally is try to remind myself of the difference so I do not mistake an assumption for fact.
What’s wrong if you do mistake one for the other? What’s the big deal?
I am very aware that my posts are extra long and made even longer with my constant reminders of "my opinion", "I feel", "as I see it", etc. but even with all of those statements I still feel many people here read me as stating assumptions as facts.
I think people interpret you that way for the same reason they interpret me. They get lost in what you are saying, glaze over and only hear that you are still talking, talking, talking. Anyone doing all that talking is not conversing and exchanging ideas, but telling, no matter how much you try to condition it. (I might add that this is cyberspace and all you have to do is click to the next post, so I will keep talking all I want.)
I do not want to write you or anyone off just because you may not get me. At the same time if someone seems to be just interested in baiting my weaknesses or pressuring me from a bullying point of view, I would not be interested in pursuing communication with them. I HOPE it is obvious that I do not believe that of any one here or I would not even bother writing this!!!
I say don’t worry so much of what others think of you on this board. This is not a beauty pageant. Plenty of people think I’m a jerk. So what. I still say what I think and let them respond. Its good training for the real thing, and the real thing is going to be a lot tougher than anything you encounter here.
Step back and look at the tone in your posts. They are all conciliatory. That is ok, as long as it does not become extreme and you spend your energy running in circle trying to get everyone to get along. I’m not saying you are doing that, but I can see that tendency.
As for LFL, she’s just another warrior chick! Quite harmless.
