I don't know if and what I was trying to accomlish with the e-mail to H, I guess he has been so let down by his parents, that I don't want him to think that I am letting him down too...
He actually just wrote back...he said 7pm is fine and I'll have them home Sunday by 2pm.
THAT'S IT......he never even mentioned Saturday....like it never happened.
SORRY - I am sitting here crying my eyes out....not really because of that but because the Vet was just here and she bandaged our dog's tale - it's hurt- and once again there is blood EVERYWHERE on the walls, doors, windows, me....EVERYWHERE, yesterday I allready cleaned everything off .....and now I just finished again, and all this time ....sorry to feel sorry for myself, but H is out there living his life and I am STUCK here with all this SHIT !!! The dog has been so sad since he left and she's had one thing after another...and I have been trying to 'solve' everything so as not to bother H with any of it, and so that I will have done this without having to ask him for help.......BUt for WHAT????? He doens't even CARE does he.???? He's left, made his exit and left us..............he is living his new life and why bother caring how or what we do to survive all this ???!!!!!
SOrry, just breaking down heavily right now....maybe it's just me seeing REALITY.........
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
