Tam

I know it hurts you so bad, but you are grieving now and it is
something that you need to go through. Just let it out and
take time to heal. This isn't easy, but you are going to have
to have patience.

You won't see any baby steps from him in quite a while...this is
going to be based on changing yourself...it will take time.
Focus on you and how you are going to change.

In response about your Doctor's suggestion to see the therapist,
most definitely. A MC will be beneficial to you both, but your
husband won't want to go right now. I would suggest that the
focus be placed on you and in overcoming your need to control.
You would get so much out of it...because, you, are the one who
needs to change...change causes a reaction from anyone and until
you work on yourself - there won't be any change.

LOL..it seems like Lin and I are team-tagging you...but she is
right...don't change any banking accounts, nor suggest that you
divy up the business. Leave everything as it is. There is no
reason to mess with all of that, unless you are going to file
for divorce. You don't want that....

A couple of things that need attention, in my opinion:

1. Forget about the fact that your husband just "leaves"
without saying goodbye...maybe he has thought that those words
are too close to how he feels, right now. It's meaningless
to even worry over it, let it go.
2. Stop talking about future plans with the company to him.
You are, again, fishing for assurance that he will be part of
your life - you are trying to control again, but in a slicker
way - enough of this...your "HOPE" is inside of you, not him.
3. You need to realize - "There is nothing to can say, do or
try, to force him back to you..." other than push him into the
OW permanently.

Tam, the only way he will even possibly coming back, will to see
you in a different light - independent, happy, going about your
business, letting him see that you are stable without him.

If you want him bad enough...your "ONLY" choice is to walk in
the opposite direction from him. Any other way is pursuing him
and he does not want that. It seems like that is the least of
what you want to do, but believe me, THAT is the only thing that
works. Now, while walking away...you must change, that will
take you a couple of months to do...so don't wait for signs from
him that he's taking steps to come back to you...he does not see
anything, because you haven't started yet.

Make the appointment with the therapist, it will help you get
back on track...the issue is you - not your husband's affair.
He left you because he didn't like what you have become. You
need to find out what it is that makes you so driven.

You can do this, but it will take time... \:\)
So, stop and making yourself and get some
because you need to be healthy to pull this off...