Fearless may have been right, but she is still divorced.
Ouch! I missed this the first time through. I really have problems with slams against people who are divorced, as if it is an indication they failed or that they were the "wrong" person.
Quote:
In all fairness to me, I am divorced because xH chose to have an affair, not work on the marriage after the affair ended, and restarted the affair after I moved out at his request. Not in response to how I treated him. It was because he could not face his issue and not because I pushed him too hard. I worry that I pushed too hard. He does not think so.
Adultery is never the answer to marital problems. That you were willing to work on the marriage after the affair is an indication of your willingness and open heart.
Do stop beating yourself up over whether or not you pushed too hard. We can at best make good faith efforts, be open to our own shortcomings and contributions and ask for good faith efforts from our spouses. Some spouses just aren't willing to make that effort.
