I think this is where I belong

[LoginName]

Bo Dia,
Glad to hear you had a good evening. I need to make more friends and have more good evenings myself. Wish I could join you for a dinner of something good and British. My friend is a waiter and works nights, so I don't get to see him as often as I'd like. That and I'm broke, so it's not easy to go out much now. Life's little tests, I guess.

I was thinking that you might be going down the road my friend was taking; really detaching from your W and moving on. It doesn't look like you are doing that. I don't know if that's good or not. It’s amazing how forgiving, loving, and patient we are. Not all men, maybe not most men, could do what we are doing. And all the strong, loving women on this site too!! (I think I'll suggest to my friend that he may have closed the door too soon. We obviously believe there is still hope for our marriages. Perhaps he could leave the door cracked open for his girlfriend (they were like they were married and good with and for each other).

But back to you. You haven't given up and moved on have you? Regardless, I think you do need to do what's best for you right now and if that means taking the job that's 3 hours away (by the way, is that 3 metric hours?) then you should do it.

Depending on how deep into MLC your W is, and if it's possible to believe anything she tells you (remember, believe nothing of what they say?) then I think the talk over coffee may be a good idea (especially now that the UK actually has some good coffee. Maybe the US will learn how to brew tea someday too). Again, my view is largely influenced by my own sitch, so take it for what it's worth. My W seems very coherent and has been giving me an idea of where her head is at. There may be some corollaries.

The main point form my W, and I'd guess from yours, is that they still will make the ILYBINILWY speech. That is so hard for me to understand, and it hurts, but she doesn't love me now. My guess is your W doesn't love you right now either. Do you want to have a cup of coffee with her and hear that from her? Maybe it will help you to hear it, even if it hurts.

It is probably part of the MLC journey, right?

If you need to know what your W is thinking as far as child custody, financial arrangements, etc. it might be a good idea to talk to her too.

After all that rambling, a reminder about what’s important; take care of yourself and your D.

I think your posts show a positive progression. It seems to me you’re getting stronger and happier. There will be backsliding and bad times, but you’re moving in the right direction. It looks like you are helping others on this site too. It feels good to pass on some of what you’ve learned and support others, doesn’t it?

When I lived in Scotland, they always made fun of us Americans for saying this, but, Have a Good Day.