Life of Job

[81388*]

Thank you;

These posts do help. I really think I would be lost without this input. It is so helpful to just visit with people who are going through the same thing, experiencing the same trials.

Today was my daughter's 12th birthday. She is an amazing young woman. Full of life and all its possibilities. She loves art, music, animals, and figuring out how things work. Her imagination is endless and her heart is as big as the universe. She is having the hardest time with this because she is the "fixer". She has always been the one who is worried about justice and fairness, a true middle child. We were talking the other night about Mom leaving and what it meant and didn't mean, how it made her feel, etc. I told her that if there was something I could do to make it all better, I would. I said that Mom and Dad have to find their way back to each other, and that if that couldn't happen then we would still be OK because we had God and each other. She was really struggling with "why bad things happen to good people?" We talked for awhile, and I told her that we all deserved to be happy, and what makes Mom happy is not being with Dad right now, but that being away from them made her sad, so it was really important to try and make the time with Mom meaningful. I told her that we can't make each other feel the way we think they should, that each of us gets to choose how and what we feel. When I asked her if that made sense, she said "it means that you love Mom enough to let her go." It still makes me cry just typing it, but I told her yes, I love her that much.

Tonight was a good night. W got off on time and made it here with time to visit while dinner was cooking. D12 had requested steak, God I love that girl. In between trips to the grill, W visited with kids and me. We had a great meal, cake and ice cream, opened presents. I was detached and just having fun all night. As W was getting ready to leave, she was blinking and rubbing her eyes and said she had to get to her place and get her eye drops. I smiled and told her "oh, I thought you were winking at me", she smiled her old smile that lights up the room, then I winked at her and said my eyes are just fine. She replied "yes, I know they are."