Hi LFL, I guess the schedule represents for me a chance to have some control over the timing and circumstances of ML. It got a little tiring just following my H's agenda...I guess when he then wanted me to reject his advances sometimes...well, the whole thing just got confusing. I began to feel like my needs weren't being met. I wanted back some control.
My communication style still leaves a lot to be desired. I have a tendency ( still) to not speak up til it gets too much for me, and then I'm overreactive. I have asked H to join the board here ( esp since there have been more couples lately)but he doesn't want to. He says that if I have anything to say to him to just say it right to him, he is listening. Well, he may listen but then he does what he wants anyway! I see your point about not making the schedule such an issue...I was just getting a little polarized, wanting things MY way.
He came home early tonight and is watching TV with my son. He has been VERY nice...snuggled with me a bit...mentioned he'd like to be intimate tomorrow nite ( which is not a scheduled nite). I will snap out of my lower level 4 stuff and make it a fun evening. Now where's the chocolate?
