Huband just moved in with OW

[Danu]

Thanks Lawless,

I've thought about changing the locks, but I don't think I can legally. He does still own 1/2 of this house. Besides, I've told him that he can have anything he wants, including the house. He keeps saying he doesn't want the house or anything that's been mine. I did tell him again Tues that it hurts me to come home and find stuff gone, that I'd prefer to know what he wants and that I'll help him pack! I asked why he took the Kayak he bought me, after telling me I could have it. He couldn't give me a good answer, he just said he wanted it, and I said that's fine-and never let on that I know OW has her own Kayak. I know in my heart he took it to prove something to her.

I think I'm doing pretty good on the exterior. I'm happy not to talk to him, and for the most part I can hold it together in front of people, BUT, sometimes I have to go sit in my car at work and cry. I feel like I'm on the brink of tears most of the time, like I did when he first dropped the bomb a year ago. I know I will get through this, and it's normal to feel this way as he only just left really.

I have today and tomorrow off, the weather is awful, so I'm going to rearrange some furniture! That always cheers me up!

Danu

[Danu]

It's been a few days since I last posted. Not too much new with my sitch. OW's husband has called a few times. The poor guy! I feel so bad for him! I am really torn as to if I should have a lot of contact with him. On some level it eases my pain as he understands how I feel. On the other hand, I've had to tell him that I do not want to know what "they" are up to. He does his best to honor my wishes in that respect. He's been calling her constantly, and the most he's gone is 3 days with no contact. I've told him over and over he has to stop contacting her. But, like so many of the WAS, she often leads him on, saying "Who knows what the future will bring...."

I did find out that their daughter has no intention of staying with them, and every weekend has been staying with her dad. Don't know what's up with H wanting his bed all of a sudden, and I guess I don't care. I actually feel better emotionally NOT having contact with him. Although he's still on my mind all the time. I'm sick of it. It's a real struggle to GAL!!! I've been spending alot of time on this board reading. It's so helpful. I wish OW's husband would do that too. I've sent him books, told him about this site, so maybe he will start soon.

I've started smoking again. At first I was ashamed of myself, but I think it's helping a little. I will quit again! The Dr. upped my blood pressure meds, so once that plains off I'll quit.

It's a pretty nice day here, and I've got the day off unexpectedly, so I"m shoveling snow. I love to shovel snow! Been spending time with friends, and that helps.

I am still very hopeful, and that makes it hard to GAL. I"ve always been so independant, and interested in so many things. I can't believe it's so hard to just plain think of something else!

As always, thanks for listening! We all know that someday we will be happy again!

Danu

[MidwesternGirl]

I wonder how Hand OW would react if they saw you with OW's H?

I am sooooooo bad!!!!

It is sad.

[Danu]

OW is mad as hell at her H for talking to me at all. I told him how strange this is, we're just talking on the phone and she's upset. It's like he and I are having an affair, not them! Marcika says I'm a threat to her. Not only with my H, but now with her's too! My H isn't too thrilled about this either, although he wont come right out and say anything to me about it, but I can tell by the way he acts.

Yes, the thought has crossed my mind that it would be fun to waltz into a restaurant they were at with me on his arm! But it's just a fun naughty thought.

OW's H told me that he called her cell phone not too long ago and my H answered. They exchanged words, needless to say, and it ended with OW's H inviting my H over to his house to "settle this". My H didn't go. Guess he's not as big and bad as he thinks he is. Then OW's H got my H's cell phone number and called to tell him that he's fighting for his M. OW's H wound up behind my H on the highway one day and pulled up along side of him and gave him the evil eye, and H wouldn't look at him.

Guess he didn't know what he was getting himself into!

I'd like to know if anyone else has contact with the OP's spouse, and how that's going.

Danu

[mrspoolboyz]

I've been spending alot of time on this board reading. It's so helpful. I wish OW's husband would do that too. I've sent him books, told him about this site, so maybe he will start soon.

Um, Maybe that is not a good idea right now.

You want this to be your safe haven. A place where you can vent about H and the whore. (sorry, I just say whore not OW)

I like my privacy here, and I wouldn't puffy reading.

Reading here is not going to change their minds now.

It is a sad thing.

Hey cut down on that smoking mamma, that is probably why they rasied you BP meds.

you love to shovel???????????????? OMG, that is a first.

Be good to yourself.

[MidwesternGirl]

The evil eye, huh.

Is he Greek?

And they have nerve to continue in the A. MLCers are not normal.

[MidwesternGirl]

"A place where you can vent about H and the whore. (sorry, I just say whore not OW)"

My daughter does not refer to OW as a woman at all. She refers to her much worse than that and says she IS NOT a woman!!

Yes, this should be your safe haven.

[Danu]

Yes, you're right, I wouldn't want him reading my posts if I decide to really vent! The poor guy just needs to find a support system like I did. He isn't close to his family, and most of his friends tell him "she's not worth it, move on." One of them even told him to "Grow up" because he's so sad. I feel bad for him. I'm SO glad I'm a woman so my friends don't look down on me for being weepy. Guys have it pretty rough.

While I do not like the OW, I don't hate her. I believe she is just as sick as my H. Viewing them both as mentally ill right now helps to keep the anger down. Besides, if she came on to my H, all he had to do is walk away. I don't blame her for this entirely. If she wasn't willing, he could just as easily found someone else.

Danu

[Danu]

No, he's not Greek, and neither am I. I believe "evil eye" is my term. I think he said he pulled along side my H and "kept staring at him".

[MidwesternGirl]

The evil eye, huh.

Is he Greek?

And they have nerve to continue in the A. MLCers are not normal.

I asked that because I am Greek and although I have never given the evil eye to anyone, I know lots of Greeks do.