I've been thinking about my last comment and I think there's some sick truth to this. I think down deep inside, I want her to "wake up" and I'm (on some level) trying to agitate her and see if she's got some fight (in a metaphorical sense) in her. I'm not sure what I'm doing.
Is this a fusion fantasy whereby I want her to provide my moral boundaries? Maybe she truly doesn't care that I had fling. That would be scary because it's either a painful tale-tell of the R or simply be the way she's wired. I guess I should take the advice of everyone on this board and live in the moment. As long as she is her happy self each day and continues to want to spend her life with me, why should I question it?
( 5 minute moment to think)
Ugh..I think I just answered my last question. I'm not questioning her feelings but rather my own.
