Update: Yesterday was a non scheduled sex nite. We were watching tv til fairly late, and then H says he really wants to have sex. I remind him of the schedule and he is persistent. I really didn't know what to do so I went along with it. I know that his ador is a direct result of nonconforming to our plans. The person on this forum who said our sexual styles reflect our general personalities was right on; I am a planner/organizer and my H is spontaneous and impulsive.
So I ask him, what happened to the plan? He laughs and says he can't help it. I tell him I'd like a night where I can prepare, take a bath, get my mind activated...and then we start arguing on the night. So we are back to the control wars and game playing...there is a subtle difference in that he is more light hearted and affectionate. With this go-around, there is less tension in the air, so maybe there will be more of a give and take.
