So I'm standing there, rifle in hand, high top tennis shoes, short shorts, and I'm having a business discussion with my S. Suddenly I look up and W is in the kitchen laughing at me. I say "what?" She says how funny I look. So I say "oh ya?" So now I tucked my shirt in, and pulled the shorts up as far as they could go, and made a dorky face. The whole house busted up laughing. That's me on a regular basis.
I know that you do nice stuff for her all the time. I meant one of those chores that she might try to wrest away from you if you asked her about it in an effort to be in control.
I like your idea to go a little crazy and change it up--patience can only take you so far! Do you think she would like a surprise weekend getaway? One you totally plan and don't even tell her about till you go? I would love that!
Re. the weeds: Is she anti-pesticide maybe? Okay, that's probably not the issue, from what you said. I think I am (or was) like her--I know I've said this before. I take used to take it as a personal critcism if I had something in mind that I wanted to do and H did it for me. I felt like he was saying that I couldn't do it. Of course, he was probably doing to be nice, but that's not the way I took it. OTOH, there was that time he decided to do the pruning for me and cut my mock orange back to nothing after I'd been nursing it for three years to finally get it to bloom well. But I digress...
I think it's a good idea to stay away from the little projects that she's got going, even if they're going nowhere.
You said that she doesn't want to talk about the problems in your M--what other problems are there besides sex? Do you ever have the chance to talk about them? Do you go on dates? Sorry if you've already said so, I don't remember.
You will win this, COG.
Nic
Life isn't about finding yourself; it's about creating yourself My thread: Trusting God's Plan
You are more then welcome to come and get rid of my weeds and fertilize my grass any time!!!
Fine, but I don't do windows.
Nic, She's not anti-pesticide, just a control freak, like you! Funny, she complains about me pruning the plants too much. Bother's me a little because I'm a farm boy, I know how to grow things. Anyway, I'm learning though, I know better than to short circuit her gardening. Before the bomb, I was the yard guy. Neighbor once said I was the only guy he ever knew that manicured his lawn. Well if you listened to W, you'd think I NEVER mowed a lawn. Patience brother, patience.
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You said that she doesn't want to talk about the problems in your M--what other problems are there besides sex?
Well sex is the only linguiring one right now. But it's always been hard to get her to discuss things because she used to get very defensive and emotional. She's changed a lot though, it's much easier to talk and works through things. Just not sex, YET!
AMD,
So I finished stripping wallpaper in the bathroom this weekend. On Saturday, the electrical breaker switch flipped off, it's been happening fairly regularly. Normally you just go out to the breaker box and switch it back on and everything's good. Well, that did'nt work this time. We could'nt get it back on. I felt the light switch and it was warm so I said "Uh OH, I think we have a problem, better call an electrician". W does'nt say anything but I can tell the hair stood up on her back. She stomps around playing with things, but I can tell she's frustrated. So I ask her what's up, and she goes into this long lecture about how she know's how to fix things, and how I need to trust her intuition sometimes, and how it's just the switch and she'll change it tomorrow. OK, so I bow to the confidence, apologize for ???, and say your right, it probably is just the switch. But I know, it's probably more than just the switch.
So next day, she goes to change the switch. I ask, "are you sure you've turned the right breaker off, because if you did'nt you'll get a heck of a wake up call?" So I get a very short "YES". Well I'm standing there watching and nervous, and sure enough she pulls on a wire and VVVZZZZ, flame and sparks. Thankfully she was holding a rubber handle so no injuries. But it was clear that the problem was much worse than just a new switch.
Does she say, "I'm sorry", "you were right", "it was more than just the switch", "sorry for the lecture last night", sorry for being such a twit". No, nothing, just "I guess we better call Joe electrician tomorrow."
Patience, I pray for patience, strength, and courage. I am much bigger than this. I can look through the mire and see her beauty. We had a very fun weekend despite a few problems. A typical, productive and fun weekend. No complaints just wanted to share a little.
Best part of the weekend was that I finally got my rifle sighted in.
God Bless,
COG
My Story http://www.divorcebusting.com/forum...&Number=660444&page=2#Post660444
ask, "are you sure you've turned the right breaker off, because if you did'nt you'll get a heck of a wake up call?" So I get a very short "YES". Well I'm standing there watching and nervous, and sure enough she pulls on a wire and VVVZZZZ, flame and sparks. Thankfully she was holding a rubber handle so no injuries. But it was clear that the problem was much worse than just a new switch.
I love it when karma comes around...and I love it even more when I get to see it. Maybe she'll think twice about what you say next time.
HAAHAHA! Like I WAS! That is something I've really worked on.
Oh right you are! You've definately come a long way baby.
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Best part of the weekend was that I finally got my rifle sighted in. Are you sure that's a good thing?
Based on my last few posts, I can understand your concern about me and my rifle, but not to worry, I'm under control.
Okay gotta climb on my soap box for a moment. It's a very good thing to have a rifle that is zeroed in, because it's a much more humane way to harvest an animal. Now I know how much you love animals, and probably detest the thought of killing one, and you have that right. But we hunters love animals too, more than most people would give us credit for. I am an outdoor kind of guy, bird watcher, animal lover, and hunter. My freezer has an assortment of wild game for our dining pleasure, and I am a wild chef. But here's the deal, why most people should be thankful that some of us still hunt.
It's hunter's that foot the tab for wildlife conservation. Some of the greatest conservationists ever known, where hunters, (Theodore Roosevelt) probably the most well known. I know you'd like to think it's the Sierra Club, or Green Peace, but it's not, not by a long shot, it's hunters. Not only do we pay for licenses which in tern pay for wildlife management and law enforcement, we also donate billions of dollars a year to organizations like Duck's, Deer, Quail, and Trout Unlimited, Safari International, and the National Elk Federation. Those billions of dollars are put to use in conserving our ever dwindling wildlife habitat.
See, all the hunters in the world could'nt kill all the wildlife, but one bulldozer and a spray machine could. Hunters are actually considered a necessary tool for game management. To control population numbers and lessen the horrible feast or famin cycle that mother nature tends to deliver.
Truth is, if we have the courage to accept it, hunters are wildlife's best friend.
God Bless,
COG
My Story http://www.divorcebusting.com/forum...&Number=660444&page=2#Post660444
I love it when karma comes around...and I love it even more when I get to see it.
It was all I could do to keep from busting up. I was grinning for the rest of the night. She was PMSng, and no, I doubt she'll think twice about what I say, but she might think twice about messing with stuff she does'nt know enough about. That new fire extinguisher that I mounted in the garage a couple of months ago might have come in handy. Ya, that's the one that she gave me the look like, "what's that ugly thing doing there". Just be patient COG, stay positive, lay down your life for a friend, keep no record of wrongs, forgive, and let go.
God Bless,
COG
My Story http://www.divorcebusting.com/forum...&Number=660444&page=2#Post660444
Funny, she complains about me pruning the plants too much. Bother's me a little because I'm a farm boy, I know how to grow things. Anyway, I'm learning though, I know better than to short circuit her gardening. Before the bomb, I was the yard guy. Neighbor once said I was the only guy he ever knew that manicured his lawn. Well if you listened to W, you'd think I NEVER mowed a lawn. Patience brother, patience.