Now the next bombshell - she got a bump last Oct. I was thinking more along the lines of she discovered a bump as in, it was developing for a long time and asked yourself, why wouldn't both people have it. When you first discovered yours, I would have assumed the HPV was already transmitted to your W. 4 years later, after going through some stressful life changes, Yes stress brings out dormant diseases.
I'm struggling with a range of conflicting emotions. On one hand, I feel like we now have a valid reason for not ML and this takes the pressure off of me. I'm not sure why I feel this is a good thing...it contradicts everything I want. I need help exploring this one. Maybe because of all the guilt and conflict that different forms of sexual activities have caused, you have a variety of frustration, anxiety, and guilty feelings, knowing how your W feels or has felt about sex. I think some of the old baggage is really to get past and can cause problems for a long time, even resurface after being dormant for some time.
Good sex causes feelings, and on the other end, even bad sex influences how you react to intimate feelings and/or interactions.
Since this, she has twice asked me to pick up feminine hygiene products at the store. Well she is changing. It can be a good sign. Something to show she depends on you and isn’t reluctant to have you help her with her needs.
I did this for my sister was I was 12, red faced but I did it. I do it for my W, wondering what others think but why be concerned what someone else thinks. Do it because it needs to be done.
My W was working as a nurse a few wears ago. She had a needle stick so had to be placed on blood transfer disease watch. In simple terms, we had to use condoms for 6 months, till all her blood work came back negative. Here I am at Wal-Mart, a 60 year old male with a female by my side about the same age, buying “rubbers’ and going through the check out line.
What did people think? Maybe I picked up a older hooker, a AFF date, was fooling around with my FWB (friend with benefits)????? It needed to be done, so “I” did it.
Y’all have a good laugh. It felt a little like I was in the kid in the drug store in the movie “The “Summer of ‘42” I took then home and didn’t fill them with water BTW.
Sadly, I doubt I will be able to find someone here to relate to their experience.. I can relate to the sexual disconnects between you and your W. It happened to many of the posters.
About the HPV, I don’t have any experience in that area. I did see a TV program directed to females about STD, rates of transmission from females to males and from males to females. The transmission rate is not always equal and the cure methods/rates are not equal.
The final advice which made sense was wash before and after and the woman should use a female condom http://www.avert.org/femcond.htm They were more effective reducing moist tissue STD's. I would ask your medical provider about re-infecting each other and ways to lessen that chance.
