Here's Your Sign

[FaithfulH]

OK, Everybody! How 'bout some fun? Are you familiar with Bill Engvall's "Here's Your Sign" routine? He has performed this as a part of the "Blue Collar Comedy Tour" along with Jeff Foxworthy and several other comedians. Here's a little sample:

THE STUPID SIGN
Stupid people should have to wear signs that just say, "I'm Stupid." That way you wouldn't rely on them, would you? You wouldn't ask them anything. It would be like, "Excuse me...oops...never mind, didn't see your sign."

It's like before my wife and I moved. Our house was full of boxes and there was a U-Haul truck in our driveway. My neighbor comes over and says, "Hey, you moving?" "Nope. We just pack our stuff up once or twice a week to see how many boxes it takes. Here's your sign."

A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of mine, we pulled his boat into the dock, I lifted up this big ol' stringer of bass and this idiot on the dock goes, "Hey, y'all catch all them fish?" "Nope. Talked 'em into giving up. Here's your sign."

In the spirit of Bill Engvall's "Here's Your Sign" routine, let's share the wacky stuff our MLCers have said to us....along with the response you would have liked to have given them. I'll start:

I have lost nearly 100 lbs since the bomb and my W has not made a single mention of this fact even though we still live in the same house and see each other daily. Friday night, she says "FaithfulH, do you belong to a gym?"...."Nope, I was on the Home Shopping Network and I bought the new Ronco-matic Home Liposuction Machine! Here's Your Sign!"