Mopsey, No one can predict whether your marriage is over or not. Only you can determine if you've had enough of his acting out and want out of the marriage.
The reason it is easier for him TM is that he doesn't have to hear your voice and be reminded of what a jerk he's been. Talking to you on the phone or in person requires him to put on a mask of deception which takes a lot of effort and energy. It's all part of the mlc journey. I suspect you will have quite a few calls from the "ET" before it's all over with.
BTW, if you son feels comfortable speaking to the guidance counselor, that should be okay. I would play this one by ear and hopefully the counselor that your h is seeing will encourage your h to return.
I hope everything turns out okay at the swim meet. Sitting w/friends may be a good idea at this time.
Enjoy the day and we all will be cheering your daughter on.
