:sigh: Cobra, you're just not getting it, are you?
I’m not sure what type of scenario you two are talking about but I do not mean overt sexual comments which could be clearly considered sexual harassment.
By who? An adult? In 2007? In the early 1970s a 10 year old girl like me had never heard the term "sexual harassment." You're looking at it from the POV of an adult male.
I am talking about teasing sort of comments that one girl might say to another but for some reason are considered inappropriate for a parent. To me, these types of comments could set up a guilt complex in a girl or they could not.
First off, girls don't typically tease each other the way boys do. They form cliques, they talk about each other, they try to out-dress each other. Apparently you have no clue how adolescent girls behave.
The difference I see is in how the family views sexuality. In this country, religion treats sex as a taboo. I think that is disgusting and it is one of my major problems with traditional Christian-based religion (well, along with a lot of other things). There are plenty of other societies in the world, like the Japanese, where sex is not such a taboo. Traditionally families bathed together in communal bath houses. There is no shame of the body. It is not flaunted, but it is not shamed. The idea of a family bathing together in this country is enough to land someone in jail. So with that as a backdrop, then of course any teasing about a girl’s bra size is going to be stigmatized.
Well that's all fine and good, but I was raised in the U.S. by Catholic parents. I already said my father had a very sexually repressed mother. He refused to change my diaper when I was a baby because he didn't want to see my naked bottom, for Pete's sake! My mother was pretty uptight too. Can't you see how that would have an effect on a child before they could even talk? I'm sure I picked up on their hangups very early on. Many of us raised in America don't have a fighting chance to have truly healthy attitudes about sex.
Also, FWIW, when this happened my father was in the throes of a MLC and I now know he was having at least a EA. I remember one time I caught him on the phone with OW; it was only a few years ago that I connected the pieces.
I don't even know what to say to your last paragraph. I guess it's easy to just dismiss the words of an overprotective mother because they really are just words and nothing more. You know that she cares about you and this is her way of showing it, even if annoying or smothering. There is NOTHING caring, nurturing, smothering or loving about a father's inappropriate behavior toward his daughter. It is an attack. Completely different.
