DR will give you a lot more direction--one thing to pay special attention to is that pointing out the obvious (i.e. parenting is full time, what you're doing is affecting the kids) while true, is something that will most often have the opposite effect from what you want.
I fully understand your issues with needing/wanting more help with the kids--I have three under age five myself, and every day is exhausting. The thing that has probably given me the most strength, is acceptance of the reality that for now, I'm a single parent. It's not what I ever wanted, but it's true. And I am a whole lot stronger than I ever realized before all this happened. Worst case scenario: I remain a single parent. If that happens, I'm already prepared! If it doesn't, I'm so much happier with myself--I know I can do ANYTHING. You can too.
