I was loving from the beginning--of our 34 year marriage. Even when he went cold and nasty, I was loving. I never stopped loving him. Then he had the affair. Not because I wasn't loving, because he needed to find himself ! MLC he now says. He then abandoned me. Now he is back and I find I am no longer so loving--wrong attitude but, I ,too, got so sick of being the loving one without him trying just as hard.I feel since he wanted to come back he should be doing some really hard work, but, sad to say he thinks things should just go back to the old ways--without the OW,though.. I am supposed to be SOOOO grateful he got rid of her. Oh really? and that's all it takes? Please. Every sit. is different. If your being loving changes them into loving beings, great. I just am sick of being the one doing the work and the new year I will probably boot him out. I am finding that what I thought I wanted so desparately really probaly isn't worth it--for me. As I said,everyone's sit. is different. I always thought that being loving was the way to be. And I still think we should be loving beings. But there comes a time when enough just isn't and the whole thing needs to end.I really resent doing all this DBing and he is jsut as cold as before. Baloney on this.
