I'm proud of myself this morning. I didn't tell her about OM and I having to talk 3 times yesterday, and I'm not sure I need to tell her tonight in MC. We went to the supermarket last night, and when we were putting everything away, I hugged her. She wasn't ready for it, and she didn't really embrace me back. It hurt my feelings, so I asked her if I was out of line. She said no, she just wasn't ready for it. How can someone who used to love you so much just lose it? Do they ever find those feelings for you again? We bring our retired racing greyhound to a doggie daycare a couple times a week, and they always give him dog biscuits which make him gassy. He pretty much farted us out of the apartment wednesday night! She made a comment about us at least being able to open the windows this summer. I try not to analyze things like that, but it's hard when you look at the future one day at a time, and then they give you hope that you can look further down the road and see yourselves together. I just want her to love me again. I asked her what she used to love about me a month ago during one of our confused/what-do-we-do/crying sessions. She replied "everything". I know what you guys are going to tell me, time and patience. I just wish she would at least say that we're trying to reconcile, instead of "let's just see what happens".
