Quoting lostlove:I think putting on ring for you was just a symbolism; what matters more was to find someone or something that could help you interact better.
I think this is a great idea.
Just finished reading a couple of R books, and they both talked about how to communicate your needs. So bear with me if you have done all of those. Did you say things like:
I would like to go to 2 of the pats games in the season with you. Can you accomodate that so we can go together and have fun tailgating?
I know this could make you defensive, but I would like to express my feelings. I felt frustrated as you went to see the game without inviting me while you had extra seat. That made me feel that I was not important at all as I like to go to the game with you some time, not all the time. Can we do that once or twice a year please?
These two requests and expressions did not involve blaming, but a simple expression of your desire. The beginning also forwarned your H that you were expresssing your feelings.
I can see how much you have put up with your H, but as you can also imagine, when one is in a R, he may not be able to see things clearly as the feelings and direct reactions could hinder communications. With some adaptation, you could express your desires in a way more receptive to your H.
You may also ask why you have to take lion's share of the communication by changing some of your own way expressing feelings. This is, unfortunately, a reality. But I am sure you know the reward of a fulfilling M with your loved one.
Hang in there. You definitely deserve to be treated well...
Chuck
BTW, I just saw RJJ's advise. Sounded better than mine...
