ok me being really dumb and letting my insecurities get to me...
h usually wears a baseball hat to work...and his head is stinky when he gets home from it...so last night when we were sitting on the couch...I told him he should stop wearing a hat it makes his hair stink...(he has also commented on his head itching and I noted it may be the hats...recomended a visor but he's not ready to be that cool yet..maybe I'll get him a pat's one for christmas..but do I want him looking good when he goes off to work??? hmmmm?) so anyway back to my dumbness...this morning h took his shower and got ready to go to work and did his hair instead of putting on the hat...forgetting the comment I made..(also the fact that instead of his typical (but not always) wearing of a business sweatshirt...I wonder wsup with that....I question (that's the dumb part...why do I keep reminding him of ow...let it be ll let it be!!) and h gets flustered reminding me of what I had said to him the night before...
what a way to start the day...oh well!!
so off today to go to the store to get some food to make for dinner tonight...h's aunt and uncle are comming over to bring the kids presents (the last time they came to visit h didn't come..as he was still uncomfortable with aunt...she was majorly in my corner durning separation and wasn't very good at not saying anything to h about what he was doing to the "family") so that should be nice...they don't have kids of their own so tend to spoil any in the family....then thurs night we are off to do some shopping together (I'll see if I can get dinner out of the deal too!) then fri night I'm off to hang with the local dbr's and sat we are having a party here...(a little concerned about that...I think it will end up being mostly his people (employees) and I don't know them well..then sun I think me and the kids will be going to visit some of my friends...I may look into the local walmart just for a little part time night job..extra cash of my own..and an opportunity to meet more people in the area.
so things are going well if I just keep calm and stop letting my head wander to what h is doing and why he's here...he's here isn't he..he's not cold to me..he's affectionate (at least when I'm not being a bitch) and attentive and adores the kids... so go with the flow I must.... tommorows another day...or rather the next minute is a new one...so I goofed this am...h will get over it and so will I...this is going to take time. and after all what else do I have but time.
