I'm puzzled by Mr. Mojo the way some other spouses here puzzle me. I am frequently puzzled by Mrs. Hairdog. Others are more transparent assuming that the descriptions here are fairly accurate. Many have been puzzled by my H too. Nothing earth shattering, just - "Huh, that Is odd."
MJ,
Kids being older is an advantage in exploring the dating world but like you mentioned - there are tons of logistics to sort through. I also had a lot of guilt about being "still married" and contemplating dating. That was compounded by my newly sober ex-H getting religion suddenly and telling me that any R after our marriage would be considered by God as being adulterous even if we were divorced etc.... I often refer to the whole separation/divorce time period as having a very surreal quality to it. I don't remember when I first started to feel normal again but it was a while.
Just sort through things one at a time. And now, more than ever, stay out of his #hit! His depressive nature means that there will be times that he will really struggle, may lash out and you may find yourself feeling surprisingly sympathetic. It is ok. You have a history together. The good part is when you have enough distance to remember the good things, let the rest go and be totally neutral on the ex's current sitch.
