sadly I don't feel much better than I did a year ago upon finding out about his "secret friendship" with ow...yes there are some things he's doing better...being more physical..talking a bit more etc..
but the fact remains..that he voluntarily took her out to lunch on several occasions...left the office to take her to a doctors appointment (yes that is how he got caught, one of my friends saw him in the elevator with her there) I do not know how much time he did spend with her all together, how many lunch dates, I do know that he stopped by her home 3x a week, and did take her out (to dinner or something) at night while we were seperated (actually we still are) I assume that he also met up with her on occasion after work at the 99 before I knew about the r and hell maybe even after...I doubt that any of this time spent was at her request...so it troubles me that h doesn't ask to spend time with me outside of the house...I know it was much easier with her...she had her h there to watch the kids so there was no need to get a sitter (kinda sounds like jim from bostons story) and somehow during the day managed to get away kid free too... many many times during the summer that I was preg with dd. i would stop by the shop on my way home with son so he could see daddy as daddy often left for work long before he woke and didn't come home til he was asleep sooo I'd ask if he wanted to grab lunch and he was always to busy (with work) so then why call ow to go to lunch several times but not bother to call w to bring down son or why deny the time to son.
guess I'm just in a funk...hate the snow and cold...it's pretty but depressing being stuck in the house with two little ones.
h just called (seems to always call while I'm posting) he's on his way home now...i let him know I went up to the attic to get some decorations...it's a bother we have too much (to many gifts from the inlaws) so I bring down a bunch of bins and still not find the things I'm looking for...I will be donating a whole bunch of it this year to save myself the aggrivation next year.. I asked h if the snow was done..he said yes he should be all set once he gets home. I let him know that I may be going out this evening...h said ok if thats what you want to do..(he still doesn't get it no matter how many times I tell him, "if you would prefer I spend time with you but are trying to respect my space then say so...just say "i would like to spend time with you!! damn it!" I let h know that i wasn't sure yet but felt that i needed to get out for a while. he said ok, if that's what you want to do. then sounded a bit bummed, but it is not my job to read his mind, speak up h!!! is what I want to hear!
