I never did like when it would snow as it would mean h would be out all night plowing...on occasion during storms he would stay at his brothers (who lives closer to the area that he plows) for convienience to not wake in the middle of the night not knowing what the weather was like down there...of course then it bothered me a bit but no real complaints from me.. now that there has been ow (ea pa does it matter) and h has his appartment I like it less...yesterday morning h left for work as usual (though with the winter weather here I don't know what he's doing all day) he did not come home...went to his appartment to nap? called at about 8 to chat a bit (I teased him a bit, but he still would not come up here) was planning to go back to sleep and then head out to plow at around midnight..well there was a power surge here at 11:30 and it freaked me out so I called his cell (there is no phone that I know of for his appt, it is a basement) no answer so I left a message. did not hear from h til just a moment ago..9 30...the answer machine was not on, I had decided to not answer and was in the bathroom anyway..h called twice and with the third call I answered..he apparently slept til 2 am...then went out plowing was in an area that does not have service and that is why he didn't call til 9. is heading back to the office to wrap up this storm and then will head home (what time that will be I do not know) but it is still snowing here and there though it was supposed to stop.
I don't feel like being around tonight..want to go out for a bit by myself but am unsure what to do.
one of my girlfriends had asked if we would join her and her bf sat night out..then realized they already had txt to see a hokey game..asked h if he would still like to go out with just me...he said yes, but I could not find a sitter...so we will stay home...told him to just be creative and come up with something for us to do here in the home.
it seems though we have gone out together I am ususally the one in charge of suggesting it and making the plans,, even if it is to go out with his parents or friends. but looking back over the years it seems that has always been the case (how to get the other to do a 180??) I would like to be asked out, I would like for him to want to take me somewhere to think and come up with something to do with me other than sit in front of the fire and please me (hey not that I mind that part)
guess I am just missing the romance...I know it is unhealthy but I would like to (at least for a bit) feel like I am special to h.
I don't know how I feel today about h. I will say nothing to him, but upon hearing that he didn't wake to go plowing til 2 am it does bother me that at 8 30 he chose to not come here.
