I hope your son is ok, poor little thing! It sounds as if you have all been through the wars a bit lately!! I hope he mends soon, it's amazaing at just how quick they do recover from things like that.
Did you get an answer to your question - i hope it has helped. It's brilliant that you sent each other cards, doesn't it feel wonderful that they did actually send a card. It's crazy really isn't it, before the split we probably took it for granted that we would get a card and it wasn't a big deal but now it means such alot. In a way the separation has probably done us all a world of good. It now makes us appreciate things so much more and makes us realise exactly what we have got and what we should be thankful for. I know that i am much more laid back now and silly things which would have bothered me in the past just don't seem important anymore. The thought of losing your H certainly puts things into perspective!
How do your family feel about you and H getting back together? I haven't said very much to mine, just that we are trying to sort things out and that it will take a long time. I don't give away any details. My mum keeps asking when is he going to move back into our bedroom, i don't think she realises just what a big deal it is for them to be back home, let alone back in the same bed!
Yes we have all been in the wars lately it is making things a little strained but we are getting through it still which is a good sign - need to be able to deal with bad times too right!?
Yes I did get an answer to my question. Basically H is worried in case it doesn't feel right or he feels uncomfortable what that will do to the R. We had a really good chat about it and I think we both feel a little better about it. H actually promised me we would get there! I couldn't believe it that he actually promised me something - the man who wanted to D me 10 weeks ago!
You are so right about taking things for granted. Like you say you appreciate the smallest of things now and let things ride that used to make you mad. Losing your H is a very big eye opener and I agree I think that the separation actually is good in the way it makes you appreciate what you have. I know for sure I will never ever take my H for granted again.
My family were apprehensive at first mostly because it was so near Christmas so they (and me) thought it was just going to be a sham so he could have Christmas with S and then leave again. My Mum has seen H and they have been fine with each other and she is pleased we are making a go of it. My Dad hasn't said anything - I think it will take him a while. I'm dreading the first time they end up seeing each other again.
I really do feel that H wants everything to be OK now and is back for good. We just have some creases to iron out and it is getting to us both. I'm frustrated that things aren't happening and H is frustrated that he doesn't feel he can do those things.
I'm still hanging on in there waiting. We are still getting on really well but I am struggling still with not asking H about the non ML issue. I have kind of reached another goal in that H kissed me properly last week. However he hasn't done so again so that worries me that he didn't feel right with it or something.
He has been doing some really sweet things though - the other night he ran me a bath and lit candles in the bathroom and got S into bed while I was in there and he has started to do little bits of things like tidying the kitchen while I get S ready for bed. So all in all things are slowly getting there just too slowly for me - I'm not good with this patience stuff.
nice to hear from you as always. Mostly it is good news at my end. Have had ups and downs too but not too many downs and H is really starting to say some very encouraging things and has finally said ILY a couple of days ago!!!!
I'm so pleased for you that you are another success story - doesn't it feel wonderful to know that you have saved your M from the brink!! I know when I think about the fact that I have saved it all on my own and if it wasn't for me doing DBg I would be unhappily D'd by now I feel really proud of myself and chuffed to bits!!!
That's brilliant that your H has said ILY. My H has been back 4 months now and is still in the spare room and still has not said ILY. I'm trying to stay patient because he does talk about the future and doing things together so he obviously plans to stay around. Would be nice to hear those 3 little words though!
Well done you! You deserve to be proud of yourself. I agree, it is a lovely feeling to think that you have saved your marriage all by yourself. Especially when everyone around you think you must be totally mad to put up with some of the things that we have had to put up with!!
