Quote: ------------------------------------------------------- Thanks, I don't want to be discouraged. But I am. And Nops, I really would like your objective opinion on the fact that I'm still on the couch. Perhpas it's to be expected as we've only discussed making things different, we haven't really ironed that out yet.
But I just know me, I can feel it coming. If I sell that truck, take that big of a loss and then have to spend the night on the couch.....it's gonna bubble over -------------------------------------------------------
Write off the truck and forget about it forever. It is something you should have done a long time ago. Don't let it become a focus, it will just trip you up.
Your hubby thinks you can't decide which way you want to go. He is not going to have a sudden epiphany and declare to the world "MY WIFE IS IN THE MARRIAGE!!".
We all believe that he sucks at the relationship if that makes you feel better.
Like I posted to you earlier, expect some bumps. I also said that you are ultimately the one that has to decide when enough is enough.
Having said that again, I think you should stop chomping at the bit. Erase it from your character. Let hubby see you sans the anger and frustration.
The only way to get him to negotiate is if it is an appealing offer. You have to sell it to him. Your day for him to take up his end of the deal happens later. The only way that is going to happen is if you calm down, give him a chance to process what has happened, and keep the communication up.
Getting mad right now will only set you back. As the two of you continue to share your perceptions of the marriage as you have done, you can bring up your desires for the new relationship.
Negotiation takes time and patience. It is not an instant fix.
If hubby is home tonight, I think you should gently but merrily run him off the couch to make it up to sleep on. Do the unexpected, and make it positive. Come up with your own ideas. Make the sleeping arrangements an issue, but do it by positive example. Go into the bedroom and turn down the covers for him. Leave a short sweet note on the pillow, then head off to the couch.
Oh, and trading the truck right away is a good idea. That kills it as an ongoing issue.
Let me know what you think.
-NOPkins-
Last edited by NOPkins; 02/26/0707:05 PM.
I will ferret out an affair at any opportunity.
-An affair is the embodiment of entitlement, fueled by resentment and lack of respect. -An infidel will remain unreachable so long as their sense of entitlement exceeds their ability to reason.
