Okay...starting today....discussions with family and in-laws is out of the question....if they ask just tell them you are dealing with things and don't want to talk about it...then change the subject....
If you need to get something off of your chest....well you come here and spew all you want....or ask....or journal...whatever you feel like....because what you say here....stays here
You DON'T have to accept the A....just give him space and let him (or her) hang himself with his own rope...
Oh...along with patience....get over the "Control" thing...I know exactly how you feel...I was a control freak and didn't realize it till H left!!!....not in a bad way but it sure showed up when I wasn't able to control what H was doing and with whom!!!
So there is your task....LET GO....you are not in CONTROL OF ANYONE BUT YOU!!!....then you NEED NEED NEED to get a life if you ever want H to WANT you back....and it may not be him crawling home on his hands and knees but a just an opportunity that presents itself like it did with H and I...where we realized that we wanted to try and fix all that was broken...
So...let go....stay quiet unless he calls....and be patient....oh...and remember, NO MORE TALKING TO OTHERS!!!
Once you start planning (I had to MAKE myself do this) and start going out and having moments of fun without H you will learn that you are in CONTROL of your own happiness...take that control and own it....
This is NOT about playing games....it is about truly becoming the person you NEED to be....lead with your brain and eventually your heart will follow....
