Okay....as with the kids...my kids broke down when their dad finally came around to tell them he left...they were devistated...my D18 (at the time) didn't speak to him....didn't hug him....and she stayed like that for about 2 or more years...even after he moved back home she continued the silent treatment....wouldn't ride in the car with him...nothing!
D20 (at the time) hugged him...but pretty much didn't speak to him for a few years....after he had been home a while she started having necessary conversation with him...but that was it...
S9 (at the time) acted like dad was still the greatest...but with me he let me know he pretended not to have a dad or tried for forget he had one because H would drop out for months at a time from all of our lives...
So H didn't see the emotions of the kids...and with S he acted like life was just fine when dad came around....
So no....the kids have nothing to do with what H does...it might cause him a little conscience pricking if they beg and cry to him but in the long run he has to see this "thing" through...
Ummm....just one question for you though....Why on earth would you tell your mother that you ML with your H???....my advice is to not tell family anything....believe me if you do DB and H comes back...it is much easier and more dignified for all if the family isn't embroiled in the whole situation....to the extent that it is within YOUR control....I know the whole rumor mill thing too....
