I guess the question becomes if you do become fully integrated enough to not "need" to be in a relationship can you still passionately "want" to be in a relationship?
R's are a need. If you learn to cow your bunny, and still decide to leave this R you will go into another, or many others, be it as you will. I find it curious that your choices are to stay in a twice a week? SSM, or go live by yourself in a orchard surrounded cottage. That sounds more SS. If the problem is being tired of IYO taking care of someone else, then stop and take care of you.
When x wanted to get back together with me, during our first seperation, she said if I told her no she was going to join Greenpeace. yeah right. a city girl like her. lol. I didnt laugh at her though. you know when we got D, she didnt join Greenpeace. She went to Houston for a week. The place she was angry at me for 'taking her too'. Originally it was a mutual decision. Thats how I remember it. Not comparing, just remembering.
My question is do you need perspective control, or do you need your perspective controlled for you to remain in a R. I asked LFL once before, but she doesnt talk about her sitch so its hard to tell.
youll always be able to find a way to see that his top is less then yours. Its what women do.
If they can the lioness will walk away with a snarl, when the cow is worn out. If they cant, the monkey heads chattering and flinging fruit, from the trees, when the bunny gets hurt.
Its ok, it is what it is. No person can be all things to another. just imagining for a minute, I can picture being depressed if I had stepped up in a whole bunch of ways, and my W still wasnt happy with me. I would definitely wonder why she wanted to have sex with me. I would probably think, Its not because she likes me. Some people need that to be intimate.
If you twist what he says into personalized hurtful remarks, instead of just hearing his thoughts, well... thats just assuming the negative instead of listening.
kinda like my comment about physically attractive and sexually available post partum women.
It got twisted into all kinds of things. I said physically attractive. Not sexually attractive. They are differant. It is what it is, a deflated balloon is not as pretty as a unstretched one. The weight of my comment was on sexually available though. 6 weeks ???!!!! what???!!!!! NO WAY!!! THATS INSANE!!! How selfish of her.
