Lou, if you go with the firm commitment to YOURSELF that NOTHING inappropriate will happen, it won't. I could do that easily.
Affairs, even EA's don't just happen. They happen because somewhere someone left a door or a window open just enough to let someone else into a zone When I first posted here, I thought EA's happened because both people sought them. Then after posting here a while and developing some empathy for some posters, I started to see my venerability. I think if you lived across the street from me, I would have had to leave the forum, so in a way I know what you are saying about being aware of the part of a person that has the hooks out there to snag on something, gets caught and tangles him/herself in an A.
In my younger days, I sometimes tried to get the attention of a firmly married man, and it cannot be done.. Before this forum, and another forum I read and post on, I didn't think that happened much. I see more instances of it on one forum I have read. I was reading the "Other Woman" forum for a while. Pre, back-surgery, I would have never guessed about what can happen and how it happens. Now I know about some things.
There has to be a chink open somewhere. Yes, but don't many of posters have some form of chink in our R's, even if our primary intent is to repair what we have.
I didn’t have much of a chink that I could see, that might lead to some form of an A, but I did have needs for a long time.
I remember posting one time that if someone showed up in an hour, I might consider going with them. I suppose all talk, because like your catholic upbringing, doing certain things is considered very low class/immoral, in addition to all of the trouble it would cause.
It was mostly when I felt not much would change i our R, that is when I really saw the chinks in my and other people's R.
I guess, I can report on some good things that happened after I sort of gave up on a R with BB being something that was attainable. It took a while, but the more I pulled away, the more she did for the R. I think me pulling away, caused me to see the potential chink. Maybe giving up on something I wanted and wanted it my way was just admitting to the chink.
Yes I know there are lines that shouldn't be crossed. Believe it or not, I was a more of a prude/reserved than you were when I was younger. No dates in HS, few dates after HS because I had myself and my mother to support.
In one post you said you would have been thrown out of the house if you got PG. At a similar age, I had enough responsibilities so fooling around to me meant taking on more potential responsibilities.
If I was responsible then, I can surely be responsible now.
I think the whole thing will blow BB off dead center pronto! I am sure it will. I have heard BB say she would be history if she was the W of some of the public figures that have gf's/OW.
Somehow I would expect a blow up then reality might sink in, and she would see her way to pay more attention to our R. That is after she would tell everyone about my dancing ladies regardless of what really happened.
