Well, I think it might have turned to that, since I showed that I have changed in other ways, and they don't get along at all.I am filling a void from him, lots of them. And she is getting what she needs from him. I see it that way but I could be way off.
M-31 W-25 S-1 1/2 bomb dropped 9-01-06,and repeating over and over "I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be." Groucho Marx.
Well, good news and bad new. W called after coach called. I told her it went well, but she got upset when I didn't give her specifics. I told her some things but left others (inportant) out. We got on the talk about M, and she said there is one thing that I don't give her. and basically the only thing that is stopping her. SEX, I don't satisfy her sexually. She said thats the only thing between her and OM. I told her thats an easy fix, it's just communication between us. She feels that she shouldn't have to tell me what she needs, but I told her I can't give you what you need unless I know. She is still confused and I will let her go for now. I told her when and if she wants to reconcile we can figure out the problem and work on this issue. So, like I said good news and bad news.
That is so similar to what my W said back in Nov/Dec. It's almost scary, she said pretty much the exact thing! BUT, she never admitted to having sex with OM, said it was only emotional. I'm not going to worry about that now, since it's history for me, but I agree with the above posts - you can work on it.
~Sol
~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Single Dad, and luvin it! ~ Happiness is a state of mind ~
Well, I am happy go lucky today. I think it scares her because she doesn't know how to react. I will just keep being myself, and doing the same things I have been doing. I would like to ask her all the time if she wants to work on it. But I know I can't. I think thats my hardest fought battle now. I just need to keep quiet and cross my fingers and pray. I really feel GOD is on my side right now. I need him the most to give me strength to hold on. I need him to give her guidence back to me. I just want this to end, but patience is a virtue.
M-31 W-25 S-1 1/2 bomb dropped 9-01-06,and repeating over and over "I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be." Groucho Marx.
How does one remain non-judgemental when you believe the other person's actions are wrong? How do you respect a person when you believe they are doing unrepectable things?
Differentiating between the person and the action. You have done this in your question without even being aware of it. The act is judged, the person not.
“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ” – Albert Einstein
O.K. I lost you. I understand what your saying but I am not following what you are refering to.
Last edited by jamespb75; 02/23/0708:21 PM.
M-31 W-25 S-1 1/2 bomb dropped 9-01-06,and repeating over and over "I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be." Groucho Marx.
I have to admit something, back in Nov. I also had an affair. It lasted for a short period and I quit contacting her immediatly once she decided the first time to reconcile. I never slept with her but we did fool around. I needed the ego boost and It helped. At the time I was volnurable, and needed someway to deal with the pain. I know it was wrong and thats why I stopped it before we went to far. I did admit it to her whe nshe confessed everything, but now I think it is not helping the situation except that I can cope better with her A.
M-31 W-25 S-1 1/2 bomb dropped 9-01-06,and repeating over and over "I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be." Groucho Marx.
James. You mentioned it to her, it was short-lived. You are done with that.
Now move on and focus on what you need to do. We all make mistakes but if we own up to them we can learn from them and move on to become a better person.
Thanks for sharing that though. I too feel vulnerable from time to time and the temptation is there. But I want my wife, we are already married, ML can now be better, we have a family and a mortgage. That's what I always wanted. Our marriages are broken so now let's get to fixing them OK?
Read the stuff you wrote down! Keep at it man!
~Sol
~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Single Dad, and luvin it! ~ Happiness is a state of mind ~
Oh I am done with that but I guess what I was getting at was, Muddles comment on judging. I do not judge her for what she has done. It's more pain and suffering that we can't just get it fixed. I wanted to make it clear that judging her is not what I will do.
M-31 W-25 S-1 1/2 bomb dropped 9-01-06,and repeating over and over "I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be." Groucho Marx.
MIL is coming down for the weekend, she gets the bedroom I am staying in. I can't wait to here what my W has to say about where I am going to sleep. Surprise in my bed. Just thought I would make a funny so I could laugh.
M-31 W-25 S-1 1/2 bomb dropped 9-01-06,and repeating over and over "I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be." Groucho Marx.
