I think you are doing a fine job of weighing your options.
I encourage you to make yourself and kids priority one.
If making yourself better educated, skilled, and employable for life is in your future ... there is no day like today to start. If that means moving to a locale with better support in place for you and kids ... what was a H? If he becomes history, that is where he belongs. If he chooses to make the effort to exist, he will be visible.
He is not your priority although it is great if you can keep him on your radar somehow. But if the confused lost souls of the world feel they must leave, let em go. It is the only way they will ever learn whether it is right for them or not.
Oh yes, they run a huge risk of trying to come home one day only to find we all hitched our mobile homes together and left to start a commune of lovely people somewhere. Since it will only be for wonderful happy souls, we will likely just be a vague memory to the wanderers.
They will hear us doing the happy dance out in the fields they can not see.
They will hear the crunch of Doodles they can not taste.
And as they long to quench their parched thirst they will hear a resounding cry of "Tequila!!!!!"
