I hope things even out for you soon. What an incredibly rough patch! It sounds as though your conversation with SO was actually very good. And, BTW, I don't think that there is anything anti-DB about reporting what is going on with you directly.
The thing to avoid is sharing feelings when it is all about trying to get WAS to respond in a particular way. Crying to get WAS to "get it" or feel guilty, declaring true love over and over again, trying to get WAS to repent and rescue the LBS. In fewer words, it is the needy, grovelling, pushy sharing of feelings in which the LBS still feels entitled to having WAS have the feelings the LBS wants the WAS to have that is problematic. (Oh well, not fewer words, lol.)
It sounds like you were in a place where you could really share yourself and your true feelings while remaining somewhat detached. You weren't making your emotions about WAS, you weren't basing them on how he might react to them in any way. You were honest and open and not trying to get anything from him. This is both more intimate AND less needy. You were able to be more authentic and hold onto yourself.
