I certainly hope that I never disappoint you. You're a tough bird too.
You don't know me... why in the world would you ever worry about dissapointing someone you don't even know? Whew... that's a lot of power to give to someone...
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I think that, like me, you've been through your share of battles and have always had the strength to pull yourself up again. I can hear it in you writing.
Yep. And I've also learned, the hard way, that my strength can be my biggest enemy. When I felt threatened or lost, my 'strength' became an impervious castle/fortress. It's a lovely, lovely thing for protection... problem is, no one can get in or out... including me. It gets very lonely.
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Yes, we went to marriage counseling seperately twice. After the second time that we went my wife told me that marriage counseling would not change her feelings towards me.
A counselor can't do that, and I don't think that is the purpose of a counselor anyway, just my opinion.
I think Blackfoot has given you some really solid advice... I'd be curious to know what her response might be if you try it.
I'm sure right now you are feeling at the end of your rope, pissed, and feeling like... 'why try? Maybe we should just chuck the whole thing.' No one blames you for that.
Dig a little deeper, guy. Use your strength to stay OUT of that castle/fortress. It keeps your options open, and that is very important. You are correct in saying that if your wife leaves, there is little you can do about it. That doesn't mean she has all the power. Refer to my first paragraph. You are giving her the power, and I don't think she wants it.
In knowing THAT, how do you best use that to your advantage? Now think about BF's advice.
Don't worry about how she says she feels about you right now. You are changing... and women's feelings are very sensitive to their men.
Whew... that's a lot of power to give to someone...