Let me tell you soemthing. People who show up on this particular forum are ready to roll their sleeves up. No one is saying that you don't have gripes... we all do. Everyone does. But that doesn't help you in your current sitch, as you are here, and your spouse isn't.
So.
If you want to save your marriage, by all means, you will get help here. Seriously. And we'll get in your face about it, too. But you have to lose the 'tude, brother. No one is blameless. Sorry.
