You can be mad (not in front of him). Ever tried screaming at an empty chair with a pillow for him? Sounds crazy (hmm, that must be why I'm here), but I get to say all the things I won't/can't say to him (yet). I think Rosy has a good suggestion with letting the pain wash over you, I'm just horrible at doing it. So, I shout at the pillow. At least it gets it out of me and I can go on.
