You're welcome. I am not as positive as you said I was. The difference between my W and I is I was able to forgive her (I haven't told her that b/c she would be offended by it and take it that I know she did something wrong) and move on. She has decided not to do that.
She still brings up that I ruined her 40th birthday which I apologized for, and I have apologized more then once. I will not apologize for that again b/c it makes no difference to her anyway. The other problem I have is with her family. I have gotten criticism from them too and my W is ok with that. Apparently, to her, their behavior is acceptable. I have decided not to let them get me angry anymore and have told her that on a CD that a priest gave me, he says "No one can make you angry." So I have decided not to let them to that to me regardless of what they say. I know they don't respect me and I can't change that either. For example, I am a practicing Catholic and my FIL, for over 15 years, HAS to tell me that the Gosples are full of SH_T. The movie that Passion of the Christ is bull shi and so on and so on. I never bring up religion or politics. However, I have said on countless occassions that I do not want to talk about this. I am ignored and they told my wife it was only meant as Locker Room humor. So in their minds and my wife's mind, their behavior is acceptable and I over reacted. Did I over react? Yes I did. I should have just removed myself from their prescence but they should also understand to drop it when I have asked them in a polite way. And this has gone on for over 15 years.
The other issue regarding my faith was my FIL and BIL insisted that I read the DaVince Code which I found offensive b/c how it portrays Jesus. The two of them would tell me I should (that I didn't really like, I should) have an open mind. Since the book came out, then the movie, I have stated that I don't want to talk about his, no comment, change the subject please, you get the idea and then I finally exploded. Then they tell my wife that this was also Locker Room humor. One could clearly see, that the more they did this to me, (even my brother noticed it), the angrier I became. That blow up came this past June so that added fuel to our already unhappy R with my W. Then BIL makes a mountain out of a mole hill because after 10 minutes of him busting my chops, I finally said I can make this personal too, and if I do, its going to get ugly and I will be happy to oblige you. So he runs to his wife (my Wife's sister) and says I hurt his feelings and ruined his day. He also adds, he was really concerned that I was going to get back at him by also getting back at his wife and his 2 children (ages 2 and 4). That never even occured to me to do that nor would I.
Am I angry at them anymore? No because that would be giving them too much power over me. Clearly, we have nothing in common so regardless if my M survives, I need to keep my distance as much as possible and visit them if I have to (i.e. birthdays for their children and Christmas). Ignore everything they say because its not worth it and they are not worth me getting so angry to begin with.
