lots to think about. A quick note though, H gets that I will need sunshine injections frequently and he says we can keep the house we have here. I don't know if that means renting it out or what, and whether that depends on making the gazillion dollars he thinks. His numbers on salary MAY be correct ultimately but in the meantime i have financial concerns for the first time in years....His one comment re: career that I wish he'd said earlier, like 5 years earlier, was that he feels he cannot do his profession (the way it was before this last specialty training) many more years b/c it is very demanding and takes full concentration for maybe 10-12 hours a day in the operating room. So, he wanted something he could do into his 60's and still enjoy it AND more importantly, he wanted an ownership dimension to it so that even when he retires, he'd still be earning something from the clinic since he'd be a part owner.....so that makes sense. I didn't know how much fear of aging and its' effect on his career he had. It isn't unreasonable. What I dislike is that I saw no real attempt to find something similar elsewhere.
As soon as H took the boards, he text messaged me that day, to ask me to join him and said he "misses" us, etc. Like he looked around after finishing the test and said, "ooops, where is everybody?" Until I went up there and the heroes "urged" me to join them professionally (I am not kidding, it was the most any potential employer has ever pursued me, by far, but of course, nothing in writing so far....) I know H had mentioned looking elsewhere someday. He kept saying, "are you ever coming here? Are you even open to it?", etc.
Look, I don't want to be irrational about it. But I need an honest promise that we will leave that place in a specified amount of time, if one of us wants out...even if he still loves it and even if the streets are paved with gold.
I might do something else that sounds gross to me right now. That would be to get a post-nup written up that says if we do D in the next 30 months or so, that this state's laws would apply b/c Alaska law sucks for me re: custody and I'd be stuck there until d9 turns 18. THAT would be hell b/c the M would have ended AND I'd be imprisoned in the tundra...not sure how to present that to H without sounding just a tad distrustful...
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
