Trust me, I know that I have problems with setting boundaries. Why do you think I've been hanging out here for 3 fricking years? However, I am doing better and I guess my goal is to do even better than I am rather than just popping out of this marriage with frustration. My current escape fantasy is that I just buy myself a little grandma cottage on some land where I can plant an orchard and ground myself domestically and just stay the f*ck away from men because I clearly can't handle them. If I don't let my own little joy juice pump work, I am depressed because it kills my life force along with my sex drive. If I do let my little joy juice pump work I can put some of the energy into things like learning how to make pickles or taking long hikes or designing/digging a catfish pond but if I think about my body at all I will want sex.
If not feeling that little pump of joy juice is what it is like to be a "normal" woman than I don't want to be a "normal" woman.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
